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sparkof_icons
12 blackmail letters | talk to me
the ink is running toward the page
unraveled words like moths upon old scarves...
Ink by Finch
I climb the mountain top, I saw the bottom drop.
I cling to drift wood, I swim in the deep world.
Words unspoken, seem so foreign.
Have you heard this one?
The hair on the back of your neck stands.
Another way out, another way out...
The army ants have escaped.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
Fang bite tarantula, taste of my symptoms.
Gasoline and a pistol, blood filling the bathtub.
Swollen eyelids, baffled by this.
Tell us what you see?
The hair on the back of your neck stands.
Another way out, another way out...
The army ants have escaped.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
I've bit my lip for the last time.
Fog lifts up, for the blind.
Free of body, free of mind.
I'll build my mold up, rest inside
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
The army ants have escaped...
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
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marys_angel
I climb the mountain top, I saw the bottom drop.
I cling to drift wood, I swim in the deep world.
Words unspoken, seem so foreign.
Have you heard this one?
The hair on the back of your neck stands.
Another way out, another way out...
The army ants have escaped.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
Fang bite tarantula, taste of my symptoms.
Gasoline and a pistol, blood filling the bathtub.
Swollen eyelids, baffled by this.
Tell us what you see?
The hair on the back of your neck stands.
Another way out, another way out...
The army ants have escaped.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
I've bit my lip for the last time.
Fog lifts up, for the blind.
Free of body, free of mind.
I'll build my mold up, rest inside
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
The army ants have escaped...
The hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Ink runs into my cup, I sip epiphany.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
Ink spills on paper, paper spells my blood.
This layout was made by
marys_angel01 January 2013 @ 12:00 am
20 November 2009 @ 09:10 pm
Step One
- Make a post (public, friendslocked, filtered...whatever you're comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.
- If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.
- Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ, or link to this post (it'll be public) so that the holiday joy will spread.
Step Two
- Surf around your friendslist (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:
- If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.
You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.
There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.
( christmas wish list... )
- Make a post (public, friendslocked, filtered...whatever you're comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.
- If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.
- Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ, or link to this post (it'll be public) so that the holiday joy will spread.
Step Two
- Surf around your friendslist (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:
- If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.
You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.
There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.
( christmas wish list... )
17 August 2009 @ 12:35 pm
I have been looking for a clip of Jon Walker singing Mad as Rabbits in Ryan's place. Now I know that this existed.
wishfulclicking can back me up. But it just isn't anywhere, and it is driving me insane that is refuses to be found. Hide and seek isn't fun when you're the one seeking and there are more than a bajillion places in the universe to hide.
I FOUND IT!!!
feeling kind of : 
frustrated
frustratedsound of choice: Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous - Cobra Starship
27 August 2008 @ 08:34 am
It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today! It's today!
It's today!
It's today!
feeling kind of : 
dorky
dorkysound of choice: Bring It - Cobra Starship
19 July 2008 @ 01:13 am
Title: Late Night Secrets
Author:awkwardlurker
Pairing: Bam Margera/Ryan Dunn
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 1,894 words
Warnings: Light Bondage
Authors Note: This is the first porny fic I have EVER written. It is also the longest fic I have ever written. I also wrote it over a year ago. Please be nice! Thank-you toblueandbrady for beta'ing this. But any mistakes in there are mine completely, because I went ahead and changed whatever I felt I needed to. Also... I suck at writing in tense...
Disclaimer: The grass is made of mint sticks, the moon is pure fat, the stars are bits of candy... and I am full of c*@p
Summery: ( Slowly, oh so slowly, he lifted the shirt higher, up and over his head, and looked back at Ryan lying bound on the bed, hooded eyes growing even darker with lust. )
Author:
awkwardlurker Pairing: Bam Margera/Ryan Dunn
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 1,894 words
Warnings: Light Bondage
Authors Note: This is the first porny fic I have EVER written. It is also the longest fic I have ever written. I also wrote it over a year ago. Please be nice! Thank-you to
blueandbrady for beta'ing this. But any mistakes in there are mine completely, because I went ahead and changed whatever I felt I needed to. Also... I suck at writing in tense... Disclaimer: The grass is made of mint sticks, the moon is pure fat, the stars are bits of candy... and I am full of c*@p
Summery: ( Slowly, oh so slowly, he lifted the shirt higher, up and over his head, and looked back at Ryan lying bound on the bed, hooded eyes growing even darker with lust. )
feeling kind of : 
accomplished
accomplished26 May 2008 @ 05:04 pm
Title: Lazy Mornings
Author:awkwardlurker
Rating: G
Pairing: You decide...
POV: 3rd person
Summary: A moment captured in time.
Disclaimer: The grass is made of mint sticks, the moon is pure fat, the stars are bits of candy... and I am full of c*@p
Author Notes: A tiny ficlet written on my break at work. It's completely unbeta'd, and is really just me getting back into the swing of things after a few months hiatus from writing, so its probably really bad. I wrote it with PatD's Spencer and Jon in mind... but it was purposefully written so that you could choose your own pairing.
( The sun slowly creeps through the half drawn curtains... )
Author:
awkwardlurkerRating: G
Pairing: You decide...
POV: 3rd person
Summary: A moment captured in time.
Disclaimer: The grass is made of mint sticks, the moon is pure fat, the stars are bits of candy... and I am full of c*@p
Author Notes: A tiny ficlet written on my break at work. It's completely unbeta'd, and is really just me getting back into the swing of things after a few months hiatus from writing, so its probably really bad. I wrote it with PatD's Spencer and Jon in mind... but it was purposefully written so that you could choose your own pairing.
( The sun slowly creeps through the half drawn curtains... )
feeling kind of : accomplished
accomplishedsound of choice: A Walk Through Hell- Say Anything
09 April 2008 @ 07:22 pm
Haunting Sobs
Shapes in ash of a wonderland,
The playground smashed and burned,
A senseless waste of innocence,
A punishment never earned.
( The haunting sobs of a child, All that I can hear... )
Shapes in ash of a wonderland,
The playground smashed and burned,
A senseless waste of innocence,
A punishment never earned.
( The haunting sobs of a child, All that I can hear... )
feeling kind of : 
I don't know...
I don't know...sound of choice: 3 Libras- A Perfect Circle
08 March 2008 @ 10:59 am
Big cat spam for sweetchild85
sweetchild85 This is a big cat spam… coz Ina (aka sweetchild85 ) was looking for pictures… dum de dum de dum… and I like making pic spams. Anyway… use what you want… or not. I’m not worried. *big grins* I’m more of a tiger and cougar person anyway. Oh… and snow leopards. They are awesome, but not sleek like you were wanting. They more giant fluff balls of cuteness. But I don't like lions... they are just kinda full of themselves because they proclaimed themselves the Kings of the Jungle. They don't even live in the jungle. Supid lions. I think that hippos should be the Kings... coz come on... what other animal can fart out its mouth. Seriously! And they kill lots of people a year. Go the Hippopotamus!!! Okay… I’ll stop rambling now…
I was also kinda lazy and couldn’t be bothered resizing or making thumbnails or thumbtags or whatever they are called. My mind is still fuzzy with the sickness.
All the usual warnings, lots of pictures makes dial-up grumpy. But feel free to open at your own will.
( to the real pics that aren't lions or tigers (except for one)... )
sweetchild85 ) was looking for pictures… dum de dum de dum… and I like making pic spams. Anyway… use what you want… or not. I’m not worried. *big grins* I’m more of a tiger and cougar person anyway. Oh… and snow leopards. They are awesome, but not sleek like you were wanting. They more giant fluff balls of cuteness. But I don't like lions... they are just kinda full of themselves because they proclaimed themselves the Kings of the Jungle. They don't even live in the jungle. Supid lions. I think that hippos should be the Kings... coz come on... what other animal can fart out its mouth. Seriously! And they kill lots of people a year. Go the Hippopotamus!!! Okay… I’ll stop rambling now… I was also kinda lazy and couldn’t be bothered resizing or making thumbnails or thumbtags or whatever they are called. My mind is still fuzzy with the sickness.
All the usual warnings, lots of pictures makes dial-up grumpy. But feel free to open at your own will.
( to the real pics that aren't lions or tigers (except for one)... )
feeling kind of : 
sick
sicksound of choice: (s)AINT- Marilyn Manson
31 January 2008 @ 06:43 pm
Title: Meaningful Acts
Rating: R-ish.
Summary: What do you do in your time alone?
Disclaimer: This is mine. Totally and completely.
Authors Notes: Unbetad as usual. And I'm sure that you'll read this one way... but I wrote it in another. *shrugs* Cryptic I know.
( You’ll remember this night for all time. A night where you tour your own defences down. A night where you are left helpless to your senses. Your emotions. Your instincts. )
Rating: R-ish.
Summary: What do you do in your time alone?
Disclaimer: This is mine. Totally and completely.
Authors Notes: Unbetad as usual. And I'm sure that you'll read this one way... but I wrote it in another. *shrugs* Cryptic I know.
( You’ll remember this night for all time. A night where you tour your own defences down. A night where you are left helpless to your senses. Your emotions. Your instincts. )
feeling kind of : 
okay
okaysound of choice: Rapture- Hurt
15 January 2008 @ 05:38 pm
This is a picspam that I made for erinbonnie , because you deserve something to make you feel a little bit better hun, even if it is only for a minute. *hugs*
Anyway... this picspam is of Zac Efron. I'm not that big a fan of his... but there are definetly some good pictures in this batch. I just hope you haven't seen them... And if you click on any of the pictures, you get the full size version.
erinbonnie , because you deserve something to make you feel a little bit better hun, even if it is only for a minute. *hugs* Anyway... this picspam is of Zac Efron. I'm not that big a fan of his... but there are definetly some good pictures in this batch. I just hope you haven't seen them... And if you click on any of the pictures, you get the full size version.
feeling kind of : 
sympathetic
sympathetic08 January 2008 @ 11:25 pm
Title: Ana's Song
Summary: Life from a different view...
Authors Notes: I wrote this tonight after finding out that one of my friend's (who I've known since i was three but haven't spoken to in over two years) little sister is in hospital. She was like a little sister to me and one of the sweetest, most caring girls you will EVER meet. We were both in tears the whole time she told me. She is in there for more than just this but. She has some serious disease to survive with on top of this disease. I'm hoping to go visit her this weekend...
Summary: Life from a different view...
Authors Notes: I wrote this tonight after finding out that one of my friend's (who I've known since i was three but haven't spoken to in over two years) little sister is in hospital. She was like a little sister to me and one of the sweetest, most caring girls you will EVER meet. We were both in tears the whole time she told me. She is in there for more than just this but. She has some serious disease to survive with on top of this disease. I'm hoping to go visit her this weekend...
feeling kind of : 
stressed
stressed05 January 2008 @ 08:59 pm
Title: Je Me Suis
Summary: Just a emo drabble.
Authors Notes: I wrote this because I am in a weird frame of mind, much like most of my drabbles. Anyway... yeah... it doesn't make much sense, but at least I'm actually bothering to talk about my feelings in a round-about-kinda-way. *shrugs*
Summary: Just a emo drabble.
Authors Notes: I wrote this because I am in a weird frame of mind, much like most of my drabbles. Anyway... yeah... it doesn't make much sense, but at least I'm actually bothering to talk about my feelings in a round-about-kinda-way. *shrugs*
feeling kind of : 
in pain
in painsound of choice: On Our Way- Baumer
27 December 2007 @ 02:42 pm
Just a dribble drabble thingo I wrote... It really is just a big pile of angstyness.... *shrugs*
feeling kind of : 
content
contentsound of choice: Wrap Your Troubles In Dreams- The 69 Eyes
02 December 2007 @ 09:38 pm
~ Self-Portrait ~
Why do I pretend to be
What I know that I am not?
Why do I let it consume me?
I know I would rather rot.
I cannot show the real me.
Not even if I tried.
No-one will see through the deception,
No matter how much I’ve cried.
Why do you pretend to understand?
Why even pretend to care?
You won’t ever find the truth.
This is my demon to bear.
I cannot show you the real me.
I’ll be waiting in my obscurity,
Forever escaping my lies.
Drowning from the impurity
So don't bother trying,
Because you'll never get to see.
What's hidden beneath so far beneath
In my darkness; the true and real me.
I know that my peoms suck.... but they are a form of release for me... so deal.
feeling kind of : sore
soresound of choice: I Buried The Devil- Editors
05 November 2007 @ 05:47 pm
Title: Arrival
Word Count: 850
A/N: This is dedicated to Hanne... and will hopefully make her feel better. And hopefully not make me look like a complete fool. I wrote this out in about ten minutes, and is completely un-betad. So, sorry about the suckiness. I'm posting this before I lose my nerve to...
Summary:
Word Count: 850
A/N: This is dedicated to Hanne... and will hopefully make her feel better. And hopefully not make me look like a complete fool. I wrote this out in about ten minutes, and is completely un-betad. So, sorry about the suckiness. I'm posting this before I lose my nerve to...
Summary:
feeling kind of : accomplished
accomplishedsound of choice: Our Diabolikal Rapture- HIM
21 October 2007 @ 04:45 pm
When I get bored I like to make picspams for people. This time I had no idea who to make one for... so I made it for me! YAY! So I made myself one of Mikey Way... BECAUSE I COULD!!! So there... I might bug The Goddess Ina later too to make me a new layout... That would be awesome... Spoil myself this week. *grins*
Anyway... all the usual, 55 pics, and not safe for dial-up users. SORRY!!!
Anyway... all the usual, 55 pics, and not safe for dial-up users. SORRY!!!
feeling kind of : 
lazy
lazysound of choice: Pretty Handsome Awkward- The Used
15 October 2007 @ 08:59 pm
Going Down In Flames
I'm going down in flames
Burning through the sky
There's no way to stop it
It's pointless to even try
Emotions burning through
My barriers almost gone
My mind is scattered and diffused
Somehow I struggle on
Too many things at once
I'm finding I can't deal
So screwed up is my headspace
That I don't even know what's real
Drowning in the flames
Don't push me any more
Cause even as I write this
I'm a curled-up on the floor
I'm going down in flames
Burning through the sky
There's no way to stop it
It's pointless to even try
Emotions burning through
My barriers almost gone
My mind is scattered and diffused
Somehow I struggle on
Too many things at once
I'm finding I can't deal
So screwed up is my headspace
That I don't even know what's real
Drowning in the flames
Don't push me any more
Cause even as I write this
I'm a curled-up on the floor
feeling kind of : 
artistic
artisticsound of choice: Bullet With Butterfly Wings- Freda Snell
17 September 2007 @ 10:20 pm
Blood Rage
Red, blood red
Splattered on the walls
Triumphantly I howl
And watch her as she falls
Blood on the furniture
I see through closed eyes
Dripping, pooling on the floor
Straightning out the lies
Raising now my eyelids
Staring round the room
No bloodstains on the floor
And so sets in the gloom
Imaginings just make it worse
Until all that i can see
Is a psycho with a blade
I'm looking now at me....
feeling kind of : 
lonely
lonelysound of choice: Delicate- Damien Rice
25 August 2007 @ 05:07 pm
I promised maincaneanother Lily picspam when she had calmed down from the last one... so here is a new one. Once again... 100+ pictures and definetly not dial-up friendly.
(PS This is coz my girl totally deserves it for having my laughing so much today! Love you baby)
maincaneanother Lily picspam when she had calmed down from the last one... so here is a new one. Once again... 100+ pictures and definetly not dial-up friendly.(PS This is coz my girl totally deserves it for having my laughing so much today! Love you baby)
feeling kind of : 
cheerful
cheerfulsound of choice: Join Me- HIM
19 August 2007 @ 02:42 pm
GOODBYE...
Goodbye my oldest friends.
Goodbye my oldest friends.
My happiness has reached an end.
Goodbye my oldest friends.
I will no longer need to pretend.
Goodbye my loving family.
My spirit has wilted away.
Goodbye my loving family.
I will no longer make you pay.
Goodbye my dearest love.
My life has been destroyed.
Goodbye my dearest love.
I will no longer be left feeling void.
Goodbye my fallen angel.
My body is in tatters.
Goodbye my fallen angel.
I will no longer be someone who matters.
Goodbye to all that I know.
My essence is hanging on by a thread.
Goodbye to all that I know.
I would be better of dead.
© Keira… (aka awkwardlurker) 2007
awkwardlurker) 2007feeling kind of : lonely
lonelysound of choice: Dying In Your Arms- Trivium